When Pain In Marriage Won’t Go Away
I started off the New Year with a BANG… then lights, horns and whistles. Unfortunately, it’s not the kind of celebration you’re thinking of.
My husband and I were driving in our Miata, which is a small, two-seater, when we were in an accident. The airbags deployed as a result of the impact. I was given an ambulance ride to the local emergency room, where I was treated for my injuries. My husband was seen later due to the hidden pain he was experiencing. Needless to say, it was not a very happy New Year for us. We are receiving the help we need, are grateful are injuries were not serious and are on the mend.
However, this unfortunate accident did make me think about marriage, and about the pain that can be experienced when you spend each day suffering through, just trying to make it to the next day. Today, I’d like to speak to you a little bit about that pain
What Pain Are You Experiencing?
The pain I experienced as a result of this car accident is an excellent metaphor to the pain many of us experience in our marriages. Deep down inside, we know that marriage isn’t supposed to be so painful. On our wedding day, we envision a wonderful, full life together, filled with hope, promise, and complete with a happy ending. However, for so many of us, that’s not exactly how it turns out.
Marriage is hard. Even the best marriages struggle at times. What about the pain that is hidden, which hits you on a daily basis because of some of the things that haven’t been “fixed” in your marriage? Things like:
- Dishonesty
- Addictions
- Infidelity
- Financial betrayal
- Anger
These are the types of behaviors that can lead to you feeling that same blunt force trauma that I felt during and after that horrible car accident. They hurt, and at times, it can seem like that hope you once thought was there, has vanished.
The Importance of Seeking Help
For just a moment, imagine what might have happened if I had resisted, or even refused help after the accident. What if I had tried to stand up, brushed myself off, and urged my husband to call for a rental car, instead of going along with the paramedics who tended to my needs on the way to the hospital and the aftercare I have been receiving? It wouldn’t have been very good for me, right? It certainly wouldn’t have been the smart thing to do.
In the same way, when your marriage is suffering, and you’re struggling just to make it through, day by day, you need someone you can turn to for help. As a Christian, you need someone you can talk to who understands not only what you’re going through, but what the Bible says about what you’re going through.
Isaiah 40:31 says, “…but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.”
There is hope, and just because you can’t see it now, doesn’t mean that it’s not there. There is healing for you, and there is healing for your marriage. Together, we can find that place of rest for you and your spouse.
If you’re dealing with pain in your marriage, The Beaufort Center For Marriage in Beaufort, SC is here to help you. Or, if you live outside the area we can work together either by phone or video call. Call us today at 843-379-0288 or book your appointment via our online scheduler.
Remember, the pain you’re feeling in your marriage right now won’t go away on its own. However, when you reach out for help, and when you partner with a Marriage Coach and Christian Counselor, you’re taking the first steps toward healing and having the marriage you always dreamed you would have.
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